I wrote this? Heh!

"Detective Dodson, you are going to continue to work with the evidence we have, you are going to investigate everything about John "The Amazinger John" Brooks, you will know him like he is your brother, your cousin, your lover. You will become John "The Amazinger John" Brooks. He is our main suspect, but he is also our best lead. Who wanted to frame John "The Amazinger John" Brooks? And why?"